Land of the Leaf

Having grown up on the East Coast myself, I can place some plausibility into this tale of ex-Blue Jay Matt Stairs’ humble beginnings.  His vicious beer-ball swing lends this story some credibility as well.  You’ll have to excuse the attention to details in this one, as the source was light on memory and slightly more than half-cut at the time of telling.  Nevertheless, I’ll vouch for said source’s credibility as I’m aware of his own experience in New Brunswick’s once fabled baseball system.

So it goes like this: Matt Stairs was a heavy swinging, occasionally heavy swilling shortstop playing for a team based out of the Fredericton area.  Supposedly, the Montreal Expos had several scouts on hand to take a look at a heralded pitcher on the opposing team.  Noticeably absent from his own team’s lineup at the beginning of the game was Matty Stairs.

The legend says that Stairs showed up to the game driving a pickup truck sometime after the 3rd inning, and that he proceeded to slam a six-pack of beer behind the dugout before entering the game.  He then led his Fredericton Schooners team to a victory on the strength of his own FIVE FOUR home runs and an off the wall double.  Now unless a player’s name is Babe Ruth I’d say there wouldn’t be much validity to a tale as such.  But all things considered, Matt Stairs might be the only professional athlete this side of Keon Clark who could have accomplished such a feat with a belly full of beer even at the amateur level.

I’m not so sure I could believe such a story, but I’ll tell you this:  I certainly want to.